Oh, he said it.
I go to walk in to what I think are the front doors and a giant black man is like what are you doing? Then the 2 girls we cam to support are like "Hey Tom!" and they are wearing something like these pictures I took:
I only ever met them once, so I barely even recognized them. And they all had such sparkly bikinis and fit bodies. Nevertheless, I'd say my eyes did a respectable job. The bouncer came up and was like "sorry, but the tickets here are sold out. this is the backstage area for the girls." I was like damnit...
Then he goes "Or you can rub lotion on one of the girls and you could stay, so then youd be helping out."
WHAT DID HE JUST SAY
The exact term he just said to me was "be a rubber for one of them" so I was a bit confused for a second. Then I realized what he meant when Delissa, one of the two girls we went to support, was like "yea, I dont have a plus one, he can be mine." in my mind all I can think of is (1) I am living the life that Harry and Lloyd never got the chance to in Dumb and Dumber, (2) This will surely fulfill more than my every dream and more than what I expected before I came, and (3).... shit... I forgot that I came with my mom. How can I leave my mom outside. I decide that she can wait a bit.
Well, turns out that it paid off to befriend Sledge (the bouncer). He was my boy, and in fact my mom had seen me enter thru the side doors, so my mom walked up, Sledge said "are u looking for your son" and directed her to me after I told sledge my story after he offered one of the girls to get rubbed down by me. But Delissa is like "my trainer can lead u guys to the audience so u can watch for free"
In my mind Im like Sooooooo... no lathering? not of her in particular, but anyone. No. My hopes had gone through the roof. How silly of me. I fell for it. Delissa was simply being nice in the beginning by saying I could be her Rubber just so that I could get in. She didnt really mean it. She didnt need me. I was betrayed. Hopes shattered. So I decided to say in a little bit of a loud but kidding voice but not really kidding "So, does anyone need someone to put any lotion on? Heh, heh, heh...." No one laughed and no one took me up on it.
So we walk in, and the competition was sweet. The girls did awesome, but we left right after. Unfortunately every woman there was married ,so I wasnt upset when my mom was like lets go.
We went into the city, got dinner together and enjoyed a huge wine festival going on, had a glass, then came home. On the way home, I decided once and for all I am staying in Europe and not coming home until december, and will probably return to europe and stay through june after a brief visit home for x-mas.
Life is coming together? What? Hm, maybe. Cool
I go to walk in to what I think are the front doors and a giant black man is like what are you doing? Then the 2 girls we cam to support are like "Hey Tom!" and they are wearing something like these pictures I took:
I only ever met them once, so I barely even recognized them. And they all had such sparkly bikinis and fit bodies. Nevertheless, I'd say my eyes did a respectable job. The bouncer came up and was like "sorry, but the tickets here are sold out. this is the backstage area for the girls." I was like damnit...
Then he goes "Or you can rub lotion on one of the girls and you could stay, so then youd be helping out."
WHAT DID HE JUST SAY
The exact term he just said to me was "be a rubber for one of them" so I was a bit confused for a second. Then I realized what he meant when Delissa, one of the two girls we went to support, was like "yea, I dont have a plus one, he can be mine." in my mind all I can think of is (1) I am living the life that Harry and Lloyd never got the chance to in Dumb and Dumber, (2) This will surely fulfill more than my every dream and more than what I expected before I came, and (3).... shit... I forgot that I came with my mom. How can I leave my mom outside. I decide that she can wait a bit.
In my mind Im like Sooooooo... no lathering? not of her in particular, but anyone. No. My hopes had gone through the roof. How silly of me. I fell for it. Delissa was simply being nice in the beginning by saying I could be her Rubber just so that I could get in. She didnt really mean it. She didnt need me. I was betrayed. Hopes shattered. So I decided to say in a little bit of a loud but kidding voice but not really kidding "So, does anyone need someone to put any lotion on? Heh, heh, heh...." No one laughed and no one took me up on it.
So we walk in, and the competition was sweet. The girls did awesome, but we left right after. Unfortunately every woman there was married ,so I wasnt upset when my mom was like lets go.
We went into the city, got dinner together and enjoyed a huge wine festival going on, had a glass, then came home. On the way home, I decided once and for all I am staying in Europe and not coming home until december, and will probably return to europe and stay through june after a brief visit home for x-mas.
Life is coming together? What? Hm, maybe. Cool
as u might know i hate reading but for some reason i m enjoying ur blogs..
ReplyDeletefeels as if i m watching(well reading) hangover or something.