Saturday, September 24, 2011


Wow, I have 10 more months here in Germany, and I can't really believe I've been here only one month - I've been challenged so much, learned so much about myself, and where my life is going.
Two days ago, my flight was supposed to leave back to the U.S. That all changed about a week in, when I asked my mom "hey mom, um, why am I going back to the U.S.?" Her answer was, "I don't know, honey." Thus, the course of my future changed.

To be honest its been really difficult, but I knew the decision was right to stay when I got some advice from two close friends of mine, Pranshu Verma and Adam Dombrowski, respectively;

I trust you'll have a blast and learn a shit ton about yourself during the process. I can only imagine how useful this period of limbo is going to help inspire your career path forward. Rarely do we ever get time to reflect upon ourselves and as a result, we end up living life day by day, hoping to one day approach a state of clarity which most often we never give a chance to arrive. But it's experiences like the one's you and nithin are having that force you to push your comfort zones, doubt yourselves, and make you feel just generally all around uncomfortable that can help solidify how you want to approach your life - something most people can't say they've ever gotten a chance to do. So cheers to your random walk through Europe and I can only imagine the success that lies ahead for you!
I can only imagine how the experiences that you, and Nithin, are both having right now. I mean I feel like these are mind-, spirit-, and heart-opening experiences we're talking about here...
I couldn't have put it any better - so I wont.

All of these stories are told
in full in prior blog posts, but


The day I arrived, after not sleeping on the red eye-ish flight, me and a few friends my mom introduced me to, who are my age, went clubbing, and didnt leave til 6 am. I got pretty doski'd, but was dancing it off as usual. And I hit it off and picked up a very cute German girl whom I could not converse a word of English with.


I went to Amsterdam a few days later and loved it. Its like Venice with all its canals. On my first night out, I decided to befriend as many hookers as I could in the red light district. It was tough not to accept their luring for sex, and they were damn sexy, but I decided it'd be more fun just to joke with them. So I did that with a few of them - but it did not end up well when one of them I thought was a girl turned out to be a man, and who grabbed my package and told me to come inside for more. My goodness.

The next day we rode bikes. and went to the Anne Frank house, which was quite profound. I am still impacted by her quote "I long to ride a bike, dance, whistle, and know that I am free." She never had the chance to. It makes me appreciate my life.
Then we drove home from The Netherlands, thru Belgium and Luxemberg, back home in Germany. It was on this drive I decided to stay in Europe.

Female Body-Building competition:

We drove 2 hours to go to this competition that we knew two girls that were in it. I befriended the bouncer, "Slash" I think his name was, and he offered for me to get in free if I rubbed down one of the girls with lotion. I said yes, but I was tricked somehow. I still got in free - but never ended up hooking up with any of the jacked women. Goal failed.

The best castle in the world, and Munich:

It's called Neuschwanstein. Its baller. Its in the Swiss Alps essentially, and it was the most gorgeous thing ever among all the trees of the mountain and the lakes around it. While a bit outside of munich, it made for a nice day. In Munich, we toured the BMW plant, the olympic stadium, and had a jolly day walking around.

The Cruise around the Mediterranean:

Oh, it was beautiful. I love open waters and being on boats. It was a Royal Caribbean cruise. We drive down to Italy, and it was gorgeous - through Switzerland and the Alps, and into Italy to Genoa. From there, the boat sailed to France, Corsica, and Barcelona, Spain - which was by far my favorite. I hooked up with an italian girl, a check off the list, and won the World's Sexiest Man Competition, as judged by hundreds of people out on the deck that day. Overall, I danced every night, knew the whole boat by the end, learned to relax and enjoy where I'm at, and met a lot of great people- from Germany, Italy, and South Africa mostly.

September 11:

At first I wished I was back home in the U.S. to be at all the candlelight vigils and such. Then I realized I had a more unique opportunity than anybody else - I could experience it with soldiers all around me, at a U.S. military base abroad. It was amazing, and at church that sunday, on Sept 11, it was very touching, overall.

Feeling uncomfortable, and doubting:

I can not underscore how difficult this trip has been. I have had so many ups and downs - from amazing vacations and places Ive seen to the feeling of not knowing where my life is going or what step to take next, and generally feeling like I'm spinning my wheels. I learned that the things I love are when I accomplish something, and I in fact struggle very much and am often times very upset and frustrated while getting there - while learning languages, traveling, and learning new cultures first-hand by being there.


I drank five to six liters of beer, got wayyy more drunk than anyone else in my group, went with a crazy group of people you could only imagine in a movie (but it was real). It was like a giant carnival, with drunkards everywhere. Amazing time. By the end of the night I was soaked to the bone, my pants were ripped, literally, and falling off, I stole a liter-beer mug to take on the tram home with me, got laughed at and laughed along, stumbled into the hotel in front of many Muslims who didn't think it was funny. To which my reply was "As-salamu Alaikum"(peace be with you).

A New Life: 

Two days ago was the day I was supposed to come home to the U.S. Since then, it finally feels like I'm really staying - no more second guessing. I question myself as to whether it was the right decision. I'm leaving a lot home - most of my family, my friends, and a girl I care about very much. All while I am in search of myself and figuring out where I am going with a new direction in life. Its exhilarating, challenging, and a whole lot of uncomfortable fun, if thats a possible combination.

But its my life - and Ill be damned if I have to sit on the sidelines. Im gonna go out there, and choose to live life, dance through it all, and have the best time I can - and soak it in.

---- I have included pictures of all of these events in my previous posts; fully documented, very funny, and my thoughts as they happened, as well as my many struggles getting used to this new place I call home for this year. I will be here til June. Many places left to go visit, many people to meet, many experiences to have, many upset times, many young ladies to meet anew, and many opportunities I will have. Here's to the new life ahead ----

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Pandemonium at Oktoberfest part Deuce

As we arrived at Oktoberfest, after stuffing myself with a donor-kabob for breakfast, I knew it was going to be an awesome day. The smell of beer when we walked in was exhilarating - beer everywhere. If beer was wine then JESUS HIMSELF would not even know what to do with himself. Almost every person was dressed up, youll see what I mean in the pictures.

We walk throughout the place, it was massive - like a giant carnival. There are like 15 huge tents - the size of half a football field, all packed to the brim with people getting beer and food. mostly beer, por su puesto. Top Spot Tom was in full form - out of the thousands of people I straight up pulled an Ace out of my back pocket and landed us an up-front seat at a table so we could get served.

                                                                      Our first set of brews

                                                               With new friends I met

I got plastered quick.

They serve brews in 1 liter mugs. I was that guy in our group who got tanked when everyone else was sober. The woman that was divorced 5 times was staying sober - but somehow made out with someone when even I didnt that day (what are the odds?).  The other 2 guys I were with said theyd get drunk, but I was the only one who manned up and actually did it.

The woman: We sat next to the first woman that gave me hope in life for my future wife -you see, I often wonder how much its gonna suck if your wife gets ugly. (I think I only date girls seriously if their mom is good looking. you know - good genes for the future) jk. But there was this woman who I wish I could have talked to (she didnt "shpreken ze engleesh," damnit) or else I would have told her (due to Beer Mouth) that she had the best rack Ive ever seen for a 35/40 year old. Heres what I mean:

Read above for why I posted this, 
all of you men who just skipped to the boobies pictures

I met a lot of people, ran into a friend randomly, and had a drunken hell of a time. Best was the ending. The liederhosen (the things the guys wear that are like the pants-ish things with suspenders-ish things.) Well, I bought the cheap shit - so mine broke and came un-done.

 me and girl I dont recall wearing the traditional clothes

Story told short - I was doski'd by time 10pm rolled around and it started pouring. I stole a 1 liter mug of brew (in picture below) in one of their nice mugs, used a friend as a decoy to get the police off my back(true) , and booked it. Pants falling down (no more buttons on them, flap on front where crotch is falling down) then got soaked to the bone...

            However, I did manage to get one picture as it started raining of me and my brew I took

I lost all of my friends, and took the subway home, everyone thought it was hilarious bc i was soaked and carrying a stolen 1 liter beer mug filled with brew with barely any pants on. literally it was embarrassing. people were seriously laughing.

I got lost when I got off and drunkenly felt lonely, then my super drunk senses kicked in and I found my way back to the hotel alone - stumbled in, and...


I walk in to the hotel, pants nearly half off trying to hold them up, crotch and boxers exposed cuz of the unbuttoned flap, stumbling drunk while still holding my brew mug with some left, wobbling. There was a group of Muslims there, and you should have seen the look on their faces right in front of me.

They were floored that such a wretched man had just walked in...

Mouth agape...

Eyes wider than that bitch of a center that played for North Carolina a few years back... (tyler hansboro)

Apalled at the site of me.

I stood, swaying in front of them, beer in hand and sopping wet, and said....


As-Salaimu Alaikum..." (a greeting of peace to muslims, which i wholeheartedly meant).

The womans jaw dropped even further and she mouthed to me...

"wa... wa alaikum as salam" (the return phrase of peace and greeting)

but Im sure she meant to say "my God... he is going to hell."

If you could please possibly imagine that scene in your mind right now, it was greatly hilarious. Even at the moment.

I dont feel bad about it. Im pretty damn sure that was impressive as all hell to be able to whip out that phrase, out of honest respect, at that state I was in.

Heres another boobies pictures. Its embarrassing how many picture I took of her. she knew i was doing it. oh jeez.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

"Pop That Pussy" at Oktoberfest. Part I.

(First of all, I am sorry for my language. The first half of that title sounds repulsive, but it's such a funny part of the story that I had to include it in the heading.)

Well guys, everyone does some things they are not proud of.

However, this is not one of those time.

I will start with the end of my story. Then I will go back to the beginning and laugh my way through the glorious day:

It's at the end of the long stumbling day at Oktoberfest; after five liters of beer had been put into my system, after I was berated for not accepting to snort drugs, after my tomfoolery walking into the hotel with pants undone and half on - ripped to bits, and finally after a drunken skype session in the lounge of the hotel where I accidentally told my friend I drank five gallons of beer instead of five liters. Minor detail I fuddled.

And so concluded my Oktoberfest drunken stuper. Lets now rewind:

It was 12 noon the day before, and you would not believe the clan of people who arrived to pick me up. Let me initiate you to these fine specimens. I literally could not have chosen a more pristine cast of people to dabble with in my first Oktoberfest misadventures:

1. A 50 year-old man with a large blue flaming skull tattoo clearly visible, who's bro clobbered that man with a crowbar and sister was stabbed 14 times and lived. Served in the military for 25 years. Remember him from a previous story? He was the driver.

2. A 40 year old woman in the backseat w/ me, utterly hilarious, and on her 5th marriage and who bet that by time we got home from the weekend she was gonna need to look for number six. She was a hoot. And my roommate.

3. Last and least, was a normal guy in his 30s with a wife and kids. Pretty boring comparatively. However, he quoted many lines from Dumb and Dumber and Anchorman. So, he was funny and made a good friend.

4. And me.

Get this:

When I first get in the car, I thought it was going to be a normal ride. We rode comfortably down the road for 15 minutes with fun and vibrant conversation, and lots of laughing. This is what happened:

We stop at a gas station to fill up (whats up with me and gas stations, historically?). Man number 1, the driver, asks if we want music. I say yes. Man number 1 turns to full capacity a $2700 speaker system he had installed into his jeep recently. He blasts - at full volume while doors ajar - none other than "Pussy Poppin" by ____. No idea, and I dont want to know by who. I never even knew that song existed. I was nearly sickened by the likes of it and enamored by the sheer humor of such an event that had unfolded before my eyes. Better yet...

I was in shock until I realize... wait a second...What is that sound? What could that be? Is he...
That would be Man number 1- no holds-barred - rapping to the lyrics of "Poppin' Pussy." He was WHAT?
Yes indeed. I scooted over to get a better look. Straight up spittin' 40 bars like he was born to murder.

Upon man number 3 entering car, and woman number 2 who joins in the sing-a-long that had started, it almost seemed normal. I did not join along. As I peered from back seat to front seat area, man number three is like, "Is this playlist really called My Fav Rap!?" Hahaha... yes my good sir - it was.

Proceeding were as many more songs as exist which have the word "pussy" in the title. For humors sake, I wrote down a few of the artists. Included were a song by Lil Wayne, Fiddy Cent,  and I think one called Beat The Pussy Up or something. I don't even like that word. But I DEFINITELY had enough when one came on where the lyrics said "My neck, my back, lick my pussy and my crack." I almost vommed.

 Do you guys understand man number 1 any better yet? This guy is He is also rather large, and has is big beard. I could put up a picture of all of these people, but its more fun if you just picture it.

Also, the woman was talking about her husband, and was like "he's really pissed I'm coming with you guys this weekend." I was like, "Really? Why?" She goes "Nah, he'll be iight, I just drove over to him last night to give him some nookie then drove back."
You gave himmm....    


Hah. Boy, I was in for it.

Then we arrived to Oktoberfest where the real events began...

This concludes the end of Part I of the II-Part story. It was a lot already, so I will wait until tomorrow or the next day to post Oktoberfest Part II so that you are able to take the time to read it all.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

A verse for anyone struggling

"Three different times I begged the Lord to take away what I was struggling with. Each time He said 'My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.' So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. Thats why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, I am strong."    - Paul's conversation with God. 2 Corinthians 12:6-10

Its a beautiful thing to know that when we are in our deepest despair that God is closest to us and works in us best. Maybe thats why it seems we learn the most when we struggle.

"For I know I have the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, and bring you back from captivity."
-Jeremiah 29:11 

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Why I am am an accidental liar

I find out fast that I don't know much about myself.

I say I love learning new languages, combined with traveling, and experiencing new cultures; I've said it for years. I even went as far as to say these are 3 of the 5 things I love in life (the other 2 are in that column on the right side of this page). They are self-proclaimed to be the staple of my life.

It seems I am a self-proclaimed liar.

I didn't mean to.
I didn't realize all along I was lying. How disheartening, how defeating. I realized today that I in fact despise the act itself of learning a new language.
I like knowing them, but not learning. Not speaking with others to learn. Isn't that sad? A founding tenant of my travels over here, crumbled in a day. I was in a German store and realized if anyone asked me but the simplest question, I could not answer, instead I would have to point like a 4 year old to something if I wanted to get across any message in the least. But so it seems that my accidental-liarhood has brought me to the truth; it's that learning a new language is the most frustrating, defeating, embarrassing, and morally and mentally exhausting undertaking I have ever tried. Plus its embarrassing. And I know I already said that. I needed to say it again.
But you need to know your faults before you can overcome them. Now, let's get back to it:
 Now I expect myself to try German and continue to be the jack of all trades, while being a master of none?

So, what am I going to do?

First, I need to realize that, as with everything that I try, I mess up at first. Ever heard of the saying "fall 7 times, get up 8?" Well, mine number in the hundreds.

I'm not going to give up though- I never have. But its tough. I keep crawling back to God (as it should be, I believe). But its difficult to come to terms with the embarrassment of what I have discovered. It's a rather odd feeling, actually. I have more fingers on my body than times I can count when I have been embarrassed in my life. I found out why; everything in my life that I've done, it was always easy. I was almost always naturally gifted. Most of the things I am referring to are sports; from baseball, to basketball, to football - winning season after championship after end-of-season honors after captainship and everything in between- it all came easy. And it dominated my life. Winning and success and relative ease of it all. But now I have come face to face with something I struggle with, and it bothers me to my core.

I've never had to struggle to be anything better than terrible. 

Notes to self:
On top of that, it continues to be difficult not knowing where to go in life. I got super frustrated today. To the point where I needed to exhale. Then lean back. Then close my eyes. 
(And realize the only way to continue was to take one step at a time)
Then pray.
Then become angry.
Then pray.
Take another deep breath.
Let out the previous deep breath.
Repeat deep breath.
Repeat let out deep breath.
Continue to picture the scenario: myself falling out of bounds on a basketball court after trying to save a loose ball. It was the Nth number of time I had fallen down. And I picture myself slowly getting up. And I slowly get up. Getting up. Slowly. My head rises up. I'm up.
So - I try again.

I was wrong about my initial view of Sept 11

Let me tell you why I changed my view toward what I wrote on September 11:

"It was very sad not being in the United States for 9/11. I wanted to go to candle light vigils, wear my Red White and Blue, shout to the world that I love my country, and wave the stars and stripes far more than anyone would think is necessary. I am so fortunate Ill never forget my real home, my pride, and the country I would do anything for, and am so thankful that others have sacrificed so that I can be safe and feel free."

This is why:

It's a video I made entitled "9/11 Patriotism at a U.S. Army Base abroad - my view"

Sunday, September 11, 2011

I win Worlds Sexiest Man competition on cruise

I hardly know what to write. Ladies and Gentlemen - I am the new World's Sexiest Man.

 I have been professing it for years in girls' cell phones - but who knew it would ever become in official title? Lo and behold, I have fulfilled every wish Nicole Sermabeikian ever had for my life; I officially became the Worlds Sexiest Man last week:

after I won.

me with the Runner Up

The competition was on my Royal Caribbean cruise boat last week.

How I won:
I qualified with winning the contest "best Booty Shaker." There were 8 of us. Before that shakin', we had to perform a 30 second routine or so and impress the four female judges. Mine was a poor showing - I was the first and unprepared. But during the next round - Booty Shaking, my ass came alive. It bounced and jiggled the way only black girls butts can do. It was on fire. All eyes were on those two cheeks, that only if everyone had x-ray vision would they have automatically declared me winner after seeing the tattoo. Surprisingly, I only got hammered on one night - and was too busy to show it off. I rarely do - its a treat.
Anyway - by crowd cheer- I won. I dont know how I beat the italian - but I did. They gave me a towel, a nice medal, a t shirt, and a hat.
how I got Into the Finals (that sign says best booty shaker)
Me in action. I just took the advice my football coaches and lil' john always gave me: get low

Recap overall:

I "made close friends" with an italian girl (I simply had to), fell in love with a spanish girl, hung out with three Germans and a South African guy named Oros, and his twin brother MK, and danced my soul to the high heavens every night in the Dragons Lair night club where we dance battled hip hop and pop lock every night. The black girls (actually, they were old women) loved me and I loved them. I was workin' it. I came home every night btw 3 and 5, got up at 8, and explored our destinations. I learned some italian, learned a lot about myself that I will write in the notes of this post so I dont bore you, and looked out at the glorious water like a kid looks at a candy shop. No - make that ten candy shops. The sea was my Sour Patch Kids, and my eyes endlessly gobbled them up. The best part was - there was always more. My love for maritime explorations only grows.This is what I saw every night at dinner:

My two favorite places were Barcelona, Spain and Ajaccio, Corsica (the country thats an island in the middle of the Med Sea.) 
beach at Corsica. this was my view as I was alone, kicking back and reading Life of Pi (thanks priyanca)

When I first got on the ship, it was almost overwhelming - so many people to meet its almost stressing. Then I just realzied that everywhere I go Ill just do my part - and it was awesome. So many Italian speaking ppl tho, I wish there was an italian class (so I had to find an italian girl). 


I came away knowing so many people. In fact, people were so baffled that I knew how to dance this one guy was like "If there was ONE PERSON I would have picked in the entire world that I would not suspect knew how to dance, it would be you!" Him and his crew of 10 subsequently became my biggest cheering fans, shouting my name every moment they saw me on the cruise ship. Actually, black people were so baffled I could dance many of them told me "I have SO many pictures of you on my camera!!" Im not sure if thats a good thing or a bad thing, but I usually take things in stride.
Thanks, Id say.

I'll leave you with a picture of my crew:

It was fun, but you dont have to go on a cruise to be happy and have fun. The point is, no matter where I go...

... I'm living life.  Are you?